No I don’t want to know.
For now, I may just as well go with the flow.
No! I just don’t want to keep
staring at the shore.
staring at the shore.
There must be life, land and beyond – I am sure.
Would want to explore.
Must I know; “It was easy before!”
Lost what I was looking for
As always the thing I blame is my own
thinking, and wonder how it's gotten sore.
Asking questions, nobody knew?
Felt the night sky, on a rainy day?
Had an argument, without a say?
Wrote a tale, once was real?
A story too true, almost fictional.
Ever tried making, somebody laugh?
Made their worries, dispersed in half?
Scaled a mountain, failing just inches from the top?
Cried a river, without shedding a single drop?
Told a truth, that it almost shattered.
The relation you had, which never really mattered?
Created an art, for someone to see?
Gave up on things, just to feel free?
Have you ever….! Wished of a thousand dreams?
Worked so hard, that you pushed the extremes?
Made a New Year resolution, to give up on smoke?
Slept through an entire vacation, like a royal bloke?
Felt cheated, after paying for some goods?
Discounted clothes; restaurants with expensive foods!
Laughed so hard, that you almost peed?
Chased by a doggy, you forgot to feed?
Shivering with sickness, curled inside a blanket alone?
Waited for hours, staring blankly at the never ringing phone?
Woke up at 4, but went back to sleep?
Parents, were the reason for journeys to skip?
Have you ever travelled, alone in a train?
To a faraway place, where there was this glorious rain?
Got into a fight, even though terrible scared?
No studying, then also every exam faired?
Started Feeling dizzy, after just couple of drinks?
Text messaged ‘I luv u’s, without inserting any winks?
Discovered truly, only when the friend said - “You are in love”?
Song lyrics were perfectly remembered, forgot about the Bicuspid curve?
Landing in a new city, only to find it lame?
You shouldn’t be what they say –
A stranger, loner or just any weird face.
Because if you are any of the three;
The existing world can become a very strange place
Then you shall find it difficult to survive
and soon you will numbered, robbed from receiving any high five’s.
“….You wouldn’t possibly want that to happen?”
In most cases, whatever you may lose
will only cause your confidence to dampen.
Eventually you will cease to walk,
Freeze in a single place as if you are stoned into a concrete block.
‘Can’t sit, fight ….most probably: won’t even be able to talk;
‘which is bad!
And it’ll also help in making that everyday communication
a tad too sad.
Now here’s the part that gets a little tricky
…it’s not worst, but is officially freaky.
- Sooner! you may find that you are unable to speak
a single word dropped,
which leaps out of your mouth unnecessarily weak;
Your lips seem to move, but nothing could be heard.
It is then your posture that becomes quite absurd
As if too lean, searching for gravity it seeks.
While you walk, stand or eat; ‘but remain erect!
You bow down ridiculously with a Notre dame hunching effect.
Passerby will watch.
A certain eyebrow will notch.
Those who will glance? Over of the fence!
Won’t stop and stare …… or even faint
They’ll just walk by you….
Thinking you as a defective war accident.
Their thought bubble will say; “You were purposefully discarded as a scrap!
Supposedly, they must have ran out of any bubble wrap. So they threw you away, while
cursing you with shitty crap. Tied a stone to your lazy strap
and pushed you away into a world
that doesn’t understand the subtle meaning of the word ‘rap’.”
And ..just to prove,
What is not true!
They’ll smile and laugh with a warm face –
Pointing their finger, as if to tace.
But remember the smile and their laughs!
Because; they are not smiling with you.
But sadly are laughing, pointing at you!
These pages in my hand
Keep slipping by.
Not because they wanted to,
Nor because, they don’t like me reading
them. But because I am sitting
besides of a table fan.
The blades of it rotate
The roundness of its face - flat.
Stares back, time after time ..just in case
As if to check,
to make sure you moved or even slightly shifted.
to the extent, 'did-it already and managed to fake!
It is its work – to blow air.
The nodding it does, does but scares me to hell.
When that I am not looking
you can find it staring
back, with vicious drooling,
Much similar to a cow grazing
in the field, tied to a pole
without any visible
ringing bell.
It as fan! Not your relative, friend or foe.
But then also,
it oozes air with the same informality,
of a strange stranger nearing you,
while finding your face, hung desperately low.
And suddenly the strangeness disappear,
‘goes for a tossing blow',
When you find him belting out a scream
in your very ear. That can induce the blush
in the blackest of a crow.
“I want to read this book.”
I want to tell this on his face,
of that hefty table fan.
But it’s not an object that listens!
when you speak and slam.
It just nods. Here and there.
That is what it does good. And,
I am not the one, quite so used to the idea,
Of a person, ‘who talks back and fro.
Not particularly to those jerky faces that only stare.
and do nothing, blind and fast,
back at you.
..making you feel them,
as they lack!
And also hear them say;
“you think I give a fuck?”
that being the damn singeing attitude true.
Well I can turn it off.
..I can. I think!
I just have to push a switch,
But the day is being a bitch
the humid weather turning hot
out to be
just a little more humid.
Few more pages to go
and that's it, I am off, ….not?
But it is taking unnecessary,
so much time.
does it is think it's Lara Croft
dangling on a vine?
…to get past a single one.
The TV showing pictures
of some cops chasing a high speed crime.
I am delayed because I am here;
‘In the middle of this sweating, blowing
And the fan staring
all around...everywhere.
This right here is, of what can only be described,
as the not-so-everyday scene,
from....
one of those scary horror movies.
Those movies you fear,
and that some of which you substitute
for the cheap thrills of a porn
made on a budget that doesn't exceed
a single penny or a dime.
...OMG! this here is surely going
somewhere utterly wrong.
What if only for a day,
You be my muse?
I'll talk to you
like those anchors does,
..who blabbers about the latest
news.
"Won't even stop!
for a single's breath;
'you take."
Will it indeed seem fine?
But,
The depth's a little void!
...most affectionately - A tear in smile.
Some, ones asketh;
"looking pretty does you?"
No answer!
Ever say that.
As they say,
Care is a little too fake.
Yeah! That’s like;
'If at all, must be for anybody’s guess!
Expected least of those
will be a pretty,
genuinely ugly face.
Standing nowhere.
I think it is the sand!
Yellow, grainy
and fined with care.
In distance I see
A view of the watery body.
'I sink; it is the sea!
You will call it virgin…
There in it, you be
is a nobody.
The horizon oversees
rising of the wavy sea.
I am standing desperately
close.
The tide is pulling me.
Backing a little to escape the reality,
quickly!
The cold waters catches my feet.
Unfaithful sand also;
From down under escapes silently.
"I don't wanna go." as if, it say's! (sheesh!)
Slowly loosing the surround,
the friendly,
sandy ground.
My mind nearly start to blackout
and wish,
… Then I sink,
'I see a lot of pretty fish.
It's a mirage.
No wait!
"It ain't no snow! You see."
Then again, why does it want me?
Steadily rising, above my head is,
the water,
now all over! …I cannot see.
The salty ocean might, is drowning,
my vision scary white, has become blurry.
(Yeah! it is blurred, damn it!)
"Wait! sea.
How blue you be? (I dare ask the sea!)
In broad sunlight,
You sparkle, glittery! (chivalry at work here too!)
Sea! see."
I am out of the blue
You possibly cannot want,
the nearly cheery me?
I will make you more, then happy.
You don't want that…!
"Do you!" ...to be?
I sink!
Wanting me is
gonnaa be disastrous to your soul.
The oceanic blue whole,
will go shimmery
and smiley!
'Stop pulling me!
I cannot beg at you, sea.
It's the fumbled ego,
that asks to let those waves rest
on other, somebody else.
There I point, is somebody!
Can you see, sea?
'Stop!' I lay;
"Why you still acting
like that you
forever knew me?"
I cannot write a love poem
Just ask me; “how come. Why!
Keep searching
…or looking for the one answer
I say.
Those will be my words
Of wisdom and fray
No love here!
I know of certainty
Joy is what lies here and there
Reasons abound, ‘I just don’t know why?’
A being of caress
Once told me, “’not to
give reason when they are needed’,
but only when subdued.”
Do you think?
The might me, will ever get down
On kneels or whatever.
Ground is not my forte;
Nor is it something
I wish upon
in my hung dread of dreams.
Sky is apt! For I always tendon
To see upward…
That is where visualize
takes an eternal flight.
Helps me realize
The world is speck.
Far lesser than the dust,
If et’ll dust be settled on your shelf
Consider yourself shamed.
Because you don’t realize
how much bigger it can get.
Oh it does …you are blinded of it.
Dust thinks -
‘An illusion it always should be.’
See! This is why
I am in capable of writing a love poem.
The reasons I don’t give
I simply cannot lie.
I get you out of my face
I get you out of my words
Take it!
Once and for all
“You have lost it.
Indeed you did
I waited so long
You had nothing.
Just tasted my patience
In vain. No return;
gave me small.
By all
the soulful hate.
I can’t crave
It’s your will.
Force I can’t.
Had I ever?
No...I ever won’t!
Decisions are, what is left.
Certain choices are free
For you to make.
But let’s not
Please!
Make more of these,
Those things that are called
The arrogance of;
‘the make believe’.
I get you out of my words
Take it!
Once and for all
“You have lost it.
Indeed you did
I waited so long
You had nothing.
Just tasted my patience
In vain. No return;
gave me small.
By all
the soulful hate.
I can’t crave
It’s your will.
Force I can’t.
Had I ever?
No...I ever won’t!
Certain choices are free
For you to make.
But let’s not
Please!
Make more of these,
Those things that are called
The arrogance of;
‘the make believe’.
Hey selfish!
Is that you?
Didn’t recognize…
You appear totally new.
Like what happened
to the old, you?
Been ages now.
And I thought
I must have lost you.
Couldn’t nobody
Will tell.
About where you be
About what you do.
Wasn’t able to Hear
Nothing any new,
‘Yes selfish! …From you.
How you been!
Done something new?
Must have
Scared so many. By now.
Back then,
There were just very few.
You ask me
“how you been?”
Is that true! Selfish?
Well …since I lost your side
Many knew
‘he has changed’,
Or so I think,
they liked to believe.
Well, forget about me,
Tell me more selfish…
Where did you live?
The fact I knew
That nobody can stand
you!
The fact Tinkled
my thoughts. More
day & nights.
Out of fear and
of no clue.
Take that stare off
Query & doubt
Out of my view.
Yes Selfish! I confess
I care for you.
The many years
You stood by me.
“you remember selfish?”
One day I deed
What I shouldn’t
Have to do!
“Then what happened?”
…I think you grew!
Then and there.
All thanks to you,
I owe everything and more
of all that happening,
solely to the selfish! you.
I thought you were only
My friend. Then!
Fool that I felt
When I came to realize
Something that I wished
I didn’t have to knew.
You impression me
with false,
all that while,
when in fact
you were true friends
with them all too!
Isn’t that true?
I ask now
As so much time has passed
Subdued…;
How can you
Oh selfish…
How can you?
Yes ..yellow can make my life glow
So do I think,
Well I think so.
Did I just now,
Hear someone say; “whoa”?
Must in amazement be;
“I know!”
Make it quick, no?
Come in once.
Shall,
let’s disperse
these gathering crowds,
…it will go!
Then may have we
all the time,
too,
Stop, stare and amaze.
Or to
just get going
…on with the flow.
Incredible made forms
Out that of state
‘solo.’
In time,
Brain storming,
Create - visualize
A bit,
Extraordinaire!
‘Something. Anything?’
Will work fine.
“C’mon, Just show!”
Don’t shy. ‘sway,
in glory
once more!
Move.
Like a ballerina does
Past
In a hurried slow.
Can of a
Smothering smell
It is of
the baking dough.
Erupts are
the brouhaha voices
impending out
from in there ‘oh!
Come let’s do
one thing …yo?
Grab a place
by the sea we go,
Gaze away,
Two words -
a dream.
That too,
maybe better dreamt
Just lying
Soulfully low.
Feel the breezy winds
Passing by
on the wavy shore
Point it out, see!
“I show,”
Her then I ask
a question,
mellow…..;
“Arrey! Who are you?
And what the heck,
where did my girlfriend go?”
During the nights of sleepless pattern
and the day’s that are very busy.
The many thoughts,
those of you is what keeps me wake.
Wide awake in fact, not time for peace
It seems!
Do you even get a tinkled feeling on the back of your neck?
“Tell me ‘oh girl!”
Whenever you know;
somewhere someplace
that I am found, smiling!
As always I am found
Breaking into a dance or two
In a middle of one busy street,
Or on the lonesome
that is my apartment floor.
Only at times…
When your thought rush a smile.
Meanwhile;
The world gaze’s; Stops
with a jaw enough wide.
At a person more so a lunatic,
betting a stared downed vision
And in process of the usual
They get dumbfound in utterance of disbelief.
Though pathetic it may appear
I ask you oh;
“Why you be like, the way you are?”
At this you have no reply.
But rather, with a mischievous grace
You proceed to move.
A halt in your steps and you turn and tilt
your head! ..I can see;
You merely wink a smile (oh heavenly!)
And again without saying
…there you go.
‘Oh pretty girl, “Have mercy,” I say!
What? ..You didn’t hear me!
So loud did I screamed.
Oh well! It mustn’t be,
Cannot possibly loud
that I can ever scream.
No wonder you couldn’t hear me
‘Oh girl of mystery.
Cuss it is I who was caught
Not you!
Reminiscing about you ‘oh girl
in those ….one of my day dream.
#Yes! you are free to comment here too!! ;)
#Yes! you are free to comment here too!! ;)
A blank page is what
I am looking at
“now!”
What it may be filled with?
I don’t know!
It will be for sure
With something;
O’ the other.
Because, “I know!”
of that something,
The habit.
which I solely lack.
Nothing but patience,
and doubt fool about
being rather quick
& also trying
to be a meaning full?
…doesn’t have to be.
Make sense it would.
“Oh so surely.”
What’s with pain?
It never seems to drain.
Must you not refrain.
When does it, seldom rain!
Oh pain is gain! (I don’t believe)
Or so they say.
Ever felt they? must have that I doubt.
Or, shouldn’t they have such miss behaved.
The pain insane.
Amazingly! Of love it speak. (hmmm)
In experience of what, It never did.
Still it seems the happy week.
Pain in cry of lonesomeness.
Instead of offering a laugh or two,
It believes to shed a tear (as a fool) that too!
…Lying in bed of fabulous.
Tabooed pain in angered vein.
Bursts out like it’s suddenly in pain. (what!?)
Suppressed thing in motion begin,
the only emotion the world disdain.
Pain of stupidity.
Like they all claim
I stand faithfully and agree of them,
That it is, “still undefined!”
It never seems to drain.
Must you not refrain.
When does it, seldom rain!
Oh pain is gain! (I don’t believe)
Or so they say.
Ever felt they? must have that I doubt.
Or, shouldn’t they have such miss behaved.
The pain insane.
Amazingly! Of love it speak. (hmmm)
In experience of what, It never did.
Still it seems the happy week.
Pain in cry of lonesomeness.
Instead of offering a laugh or two,
It believes to shed a tear (as a fool) that too!
…Lying in bed of fabulous.
Tabooed pain in angered vein.
Bursts out like it’s suddenly in pain. (what!?)
Suppressed thing in motion begin,
the only emotion the world disdain.
Pain of stupidity.
Like they all claim
I stand faithfully and agree of them,
That it is, “still undefined!”
You give me a reason
A thought to my voice.
…I am rendered a tad too useless ,
Every time daringly,
I get gulped into those eyes
Then and there, I am barred from thinking;
“Like anything new.”
Beckoning of me, ‘The foolished wise.
A gaze to you bewilders me,
Yet the stare holds a wide amaze.
What I have to say; “I guess!”
Will be never I fumble to tell.
As always you happen to laugh
at the endowed nature
Of that brooding curious thing.
Only subtle feature
to you and grace,
Is but one, of the many hinting tinge.
Where else can you find,
‘oh dear miss!’
a beastly thing, that monster is?
You’re every wish of beautified words
Speaks of glory, unblessed certainty
and an uttered mystified wiz.
Wait for it
till it chance
before the musings start to cover.
It seldom will carve a bloody stain read –
Voiced; “Dear it’s all over!”
Last night I saw a weird dream.
A girl in it began to scream.
She was screaming
A cry out loud.
The house feared nothing
Just came trembling down.
The neighborly dog;
‘No he wasn’t’ howling!’
I tried calming the girl
But she wasn’t intent in hearing a thing.
But instead kept…
Kept on rambling
her vicious scream.
‘She wasn’t crying’
…I thought!
The tear drop on her face
was not even lying.
‘The weeping. Now! almost little screaming
girl. ‘She sat on the dark end door.
The room lit with a figment of shadows
Out of the tiny sealed window
I was able to view
Grasp the beauty,
of the dusky white meadows.
I tried helping her
The miseries were blame!
What possibly was I be able to done?
She decided to remain lonely ever,
Her crying tears were playing with none.
The door opened, ‘suddenly!’
I was left stranded.
It was her mother
So the crying girl frowned.
The lingering shadow at the door
Was of those…
The ugly witches crowned.
The bag she hold;
held to her sweaty hand.
It appeared to me
The bag was gripped
in an uncertain freight.
Terrible fear chilled
The back of my spine.
The vision was blurry
So was the site.
The haunting site
Was screeching near,
Near to the door;
Staring down directly at the
Little screaming girl.
“Let her alone” I might’ed.
But my voice felt hollow.
I tried again hurling at the door.
…this time
the courage bespoke.
Happily in vain
the shadow disappeared
Off from the poke marked floor.
I rose to my feet
To grasp and protect the little girl’s whim
Found I wasn’t able
To impart any, a no able deal,
Reason’s I can tell,
are only true.
‘The girl is not real
Nor is her ‘the haunting scream.
She was adamantly found.
Like a adage lore
In one of the many,
‘…..my so called’ dream.
I think I am gonna compose something now
But promise me! You won’t utter a subtler wow
Praise it in a better way, ‘I ask!
Just don’t come and query me “how?”
The words are mere prodigious
Not those that they call the works of genius.
Maybe …umm! Let’s term it a little heinous
Cuss that is why
‘ Ferb never is far away from the outspoken Phineas.’
The joys they say is in watching
Not those that memories we keep on latching
Only if the imagination got a little stretching
Other wise be happy. keep on laying those dastardly eggs;
Those they do need the warm up hatching.
Description of emotion is very much a bug
Humble it may seem , ‘nope not the bear hug!’
Clearing of fear from out the generosity we lug
Landing a smiley kick to its rear,
‘for the sake of imparting a tiny little chug.
But promise me! You won’t utter a subtler wow
Praise it in a better way, ‘I ask!
Just don’t come and query me “how?”
The words are mere prodigious
Not those that they call the works of genius.
Maybe …umm! Let’s term it a little heinous
Cuss that is why
‘ Ferb never is far away from the outspoken Phineas.’
The joys they say is in watching
Not those that memories we keep on latching
Only if the imagination got a little stretching
Other wise be happy. keep on laying those dastardly eggs;
Those they do need the warm up hatching.
Description of emotion is very much a bug
Humble it may seem , ‘nope not the bear hug!’
Clearing of fear from out the generosity we lug
Landing a smiley kick to its rear,
‘for the sake of imparting a tiny little chug.
Seldom it needs to be still
Never it seems so utterly calm.
Works everytime like an ugly witch’es balm!
‘day-in. …day-out’
That is the very pretty charm.
Those thoughts I am saying
does need a little of the untold mention;
“Now c’mon” why so suddenly
the distinct rhyme vary count,
in on an verge of near sleaze?
“Hmmm.” Must be the old writer
And his stories true.
Dangling the edge
In wait that he nothing needs be prove.
During in the day scaring the hell;
out of his only…
if only found, just ignore away please.
Slyly feeling the chilling grip of release,
Right outside! ‘On the back of his mind.
Alas! Is for the time
Of wonderment and pesky delight
The bunny rabbit ensued
Resorted to some charming little fight.
Forgotten in the scheme
Are of things unseen.
The chaotic theme. “Must be!
the trance and shadows.
Wherein merriment flew,
off in a wordless flight.
Going-in on more of such.
But work secluding the thoughts
as much!
Compose I can nothing
In fear of no more …truly!
Something from an audacious writer
Blocked by his own ignorance,
Finally at-last!